I Pray to See You Again
by Cheer-The-Underdog-On
Summary: Roxas is a detective just doing his job, but sometimes things get tight and he doesn't know if he'll see his loved ones again. He gives four calls at the end of a long night. Then he gets one more from the Lord. T for swearing.


Roxas was there to protect and serve, but sometimes he failed to protect. He'd been too late to a scene. He'd failed to capture culprits. He'd said the wrong thing.

Blood on the floor.

Body in a bag.

Man on the run.

Brains blown onto the wall.

He just couldn't ever fucking win. How old was he right now? Thirty-two? It wasn't supposed to go like this. In high school, he had wanted to be a cop. Cops played it safe. He should have stayed a cop. There were risks, but they were always in teams. In college, he'd wanted to work forensics. He could have if he'd just learned how to do the fucking chemistry.

It'd worked out okay, though. He liked being a detective.

He had two dollars and sixty two cents between the change in his pocket and the couple of quarters in his wallet. The blond wished he hadn't forgotten his phone in his jacket pocket when he'd left the office over a half hour ago, but he'd been in a rush. Dialing 0 for operator first, he requested to speak with the police, "Hi, this is Homicide Detective Roxas Harris at the corner of Baker Street and Warrington. I need assistance immediately. I have child traffickers who will be on the move in twenty minutes. Most likely already loading their cargo. I have to go now, I can't stay on the line. Please relay that to Captain Romada."

These next calls weren't free, so he slipped in a couple of coins and dialed carefully.

"Roxas?"

~o~

The blond had always been weird, but Axel expected eleven o'clock calls at this point when his boyfriend/fiance/pretty-much-husband wasn't home by seven. It came with the job, and he was okay with that. It didn't bother him (much) when he was roused from a light sleep to groggily give the other a few soft words before Roxas pulled himself in pushing one o'clock sometimes. "Roxas? You at the office, baby?" The redhead asked groggily, pushing back tangled crimson locks with a strong hand.

"Mmm, nope. Guess." The younger man was teasing him, so Axel rolled his eyes and played along.

"Um...In the kitchen?"

Roxas' voice was a breathy wisp, "Nope, wrong. Hey, that's not what I called about though. I guess you were sleeping? I have to talk fast because I forgot my phone at the office again." How typical, Axel snorted. "Don't be sassy with me, firecrotch." The blond growled, "I just wanted to say I love you. God, Axel, I love you so much. So, so much. I just want you to know that." His voice was beginning to quiver, and Roxas reeled it in, so he wouldn't break into a sob, "I just want you to know- You've been perfect. This whole time. Even when we fight about baked potatoes and who needs to do laundry. I-I- I gotta go, Ax. I love you."

"Hey wait! No, Rox! Don't just-" The line hooked to let him know the other side had disconnected.

Axel felt himself shatter. He was crying before he could even get a breath in.

~o~

Roxas' parents had divorced when he had left for college. His mom had been kind and hadn't stripped him of father privileges, so he had remained on relatively good terms with both his parents, "Mom, just wanted to know I love you. Thanks for all you've done."

~o~

His dad was still up which surprised the blond, "Hey, Dad."

"Hey kiddo, what's up?" Roxas heard the slurp of a beverage and figured beer was keeping his old padre company.

"Not much, just working on this case and wanted you to know I love you. I mean, I get that we've been on shaky terms since a few years ago, but...I dunno. Something about this case."

His father had never been a sentimental man. He was the last of a strong line of Harrises. The kind that didn't have queer kids and dated blonde women with blue eyes. They fought for America and freedom. They celebrated the Fourth of July with the biggest brightest fireworks and ate steak and apple pie for dinner. He didn't say I love you. Roxas had grown up without a word of affection, but he was okay with that. It wasn't his style, but he understood where his father was coming from. "I love you too, kid. I'm real proud of you. Keep working hard. Don't do anything stupid. I swear to God, Roxas. If you do something dumb, your hippy mother will be all-"

"I'll try not to, Dad." Roxas laughed softly, "Goodbye."

The empty line caused the man to bite his lip. "...Guess I'll be hearing about it on the news tomorrow…"

~o~

"Roxas, what do you want?" Xion whined, calming her dog as the small thing had a panic attack, "I was asleep. I have work tomorrow."

"I know, I know. I'm sorry. Just wanted you to know that I love you, Xi. Real proud of you. You're a great best friend. I don't let you know that enough." The blond couldn't swallow the lump in his throat. The backup should have been there already.

"Lover boy, is this a cry for help? I can schedule you in with my boss if you're-"

Cutting her off, he shook his head, "Nope, Xi. Sorry, nothing like that. Just letting you know." Faking a smile even though she couldn't see it, he decided to sign off from the world for that night, "See you tomorrow, Xi."

Her voice caught in her throat, "This has something to do with that case you're working. That one with the casino owner's son, doesn't it? I swear to God, Roxas, if you die- If you-"

_…._

~o~

"Dear God," The blond pulled out his gun as he approached the building, "Forgive me. I know I've done a lot of bad things, but if I-" Roxas kicked open the door to the house, "This is the cops! Freeze!" A scream. Three shots fired.

"But if I could just see Axel again…" He staggered over and past the man who had put a bullet in his stomach, "If I could just...Tell him I love him…" Another shot fired as he made his way to the basement, "One last time-" He didn't know how many were in the basement, but he saw backup finally pulling up out front and two cars of unloading officers. "I'm pretty sure, I could-"

_Bang. Bang. Bang. Bang._

Officer down.

~o~

Roxas couldn't have saved everyone. He had been told that over and over and over again. Eight out of thirteen wasn't bad. He had saved over half of the children. There were more being located every hour. More being rescued.

As he laid there for twenty thousand hours after surgery, the blond's brain couldn't justify it, though. Protect and serve.

That was still five kids who would never find a family. Five kids who wouldn't live a life. Five kids who's last seconds had been spent in fear. In desperation. Crying, tears streaking their faces as they sobbed for a second chance. "Roxas, shhh, you need to be calm." Axel brushed back his hair, "It's okay, baby. You're okay."

"But Axel-" He choked on his words, "I feel like shit."

The redhead sighed, "I know you do. You always do." Geez, what a pansy. Why'd he go into this line of work? "You want some water? I bet you're thirsty."

After taking a few cautious sips, the detective had calmed down a bit, "You know I prayed about you." He mumbled finally after a long while.

"Did you now?" Axel smiled, knowing fully well that Roxas was not exactly what most would call a religious man.

"Yeah, I asked God if I could see you again. I promised that if I did I would-" Now that he thought about it, the words couldn't come to mind, "Axel...I can't remember what I promised."

"Well...that's okay. What matters is that you're here with me now." Even if it was going to take a few months of recovery. There wouldn't be any long term side effects outside of a year's worth of time. That was all that mattered to Axel. Maybe Roxas would take this opportunity to retire and pick a different job. The redhead made enough money as a welder to support the two of them. Biting his lip, he wished the younger man would see how dangerous this was.

Roxas' brow was furrowed as he cupped Axel's cheek, "I love you." Then it hit him. He recollected what he had promised. Cop to cloth. Police to priest. It sounded ridiculous, but he had been...spiritually touched. The blond was sure of it.

Regardless of this, outside his calm peaceful room, the phones were ringing off the hook.

Everyone had seen it on the news.

* * *

**A bit of religious undertone, but I really like this piece. Idk :) Layla betaed. Review please.**


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